funnyfarangs.com: Funny Farangs in Thailand

View Topics
Sun
25
May '08

How I “obviously cannot exist”, for the average Farang

Farangs love to be hypocrites. They just love it, saying one thing is bad while doing the same, criticising with the left hand while undertaking the exact same behaviour with the right. A recent example is how some people reading my diary have decided that I can’t exist. Firstly, if I could figure out how to make it so only Thai people could read my diary, I would have done that already. Secondly, I DO exist. I’m going to take a moment to explore the inner workings of the farang brain when it stumbles (probably drunkenly) across my diary website:

Farang Brain: Dum der dum.. where did I put my beer?

FB: Hm, let’s search the internet for myself, since I am so important. I wonder if I can find pictures of people who look just like me having sex with Thai girls. I especially like the pictures where the girl looks unhappy or exploited.

*types any mixture of the following words into google.com: farang, sex, thai farang, farang thai girl, farang thai girl pic, thai girl exploited, farang exploits thai girl*

FB: Im bored with porn (not really- Ill be back in 5 mins) what’s this? Funny farangs? A Thai person stereotyping the farang race with understandable written english and never mentioning som tam? Obviously a fake! Since ALL thai people are so stupid and bad at anything other than eating or smiling!

FB: And besides! How can this Thai stereotype all farangs? We all know all Thais are the same, but white people are better and more unique because we have universities, schools, governments, hospitals and banks that all agree to agree they are better than Eastern universities, schools, governments, hospitals and banks! I know most of the farangs are bad but I’m different! I’m a really good farang! Besides, when I take a Thai girl to bed I pay her a really big tip!
Losers.

Let’s have a giggle at some of the internet warrior comments from a collection of loosely linked sexpats from Korat. Korat has a contingent of farangs for one reason only- many poor families live in the area surrounding Korat and their daughters frequently end up in bars that farangs frequent. The more successful ones manage to convince their customer to actually go home with them and pay for, well, everything for, well, everyone. Korat is booming thanks to this – good going sisters!

The farang named Ludo (“Sr. Member” – not sure what this refers to, maybe they compare phallus sizes as part of the registration procedure?) says:

“Earning 20.000 THB and run a non profit orientated .com web page to rage against farangs – not easy to believe.”

Well, Ludo, I suppose your average interaction with Thai people is only those that earn 200 000 thb and run multi-million baht earning websites which… oh wait, no you don’t. You don’t know any successful or interesting Thai’s. That kind of restriction in your life is only going to hinder any understanding of diversity in a society, isn’t it.

Farang sebastien says:

“Most of them [have] never been abroad.”

Whereas most Americans don’t even have passports!

It was hard to keep concentrating to find any more particularly funny comments, since this group, during the course of this two page discussion, had gone without sexual perversion and beer for at least 10 minutes and instead began to collapse inwardly, arbitrarily accusing one another of breaking “forum rules” and demanding apologies from one another. Eventually someone remembered what they were talking about and I managed to read this before finally falling asleep out of sheer boredom:

Farang says:

“I’m convinced that the blogger is not what he / she claims to be as well. In the last blog of today he/she claims to have been in Jakarta and haven’t seen that many farangs. With the proclamation of working 6 days a week for a rather low salary – why would someone fly to Jakarta? Distorted facts”

This is what happens to a a farang brain when it is occupied, day in day out, with nothing but alcohol absorpton and sexual deviancy. The first thing to go- the imagination. What could a professional Thai adult who works a 6 day week for 20 000 thb possibly be doing in Jakarta! Come on.. think really hard. I know you can do it.

26 Comments »

26 Responses to “How I “obviously cannot exist”, for the average Farang”

  1. Clifford Sloane Says:

    It’s not that you do not exist. It is that you are not what you claim to be.

    The obsession with sex in your rants makes me question this, too. Your seriously unfair criticisms of reasonable critics makes me think that you are probably farang yourself. All of the people who have criticised your posts have indicated two things above all. First, they are not motivated by sex to live here. Second, they know a large number of Thai people of all walks of life. Yet these are the repeated accusations you make, ignoring the obvious in their messages to you.

    And how can you get only Thai people to log on? Simple. Write in Thai. Some of us farangs can read it anyway, you know. I doubt that you can. Prove me wrong.ไดไหม

  2. Ludo Says:

    As far as I can see from your homepage you do not accept any diversity in society, don’t you? Farangs are all the same, and if one doesn’t fit into your stereotype who cares – they are all the same anyway! If you do not want Farangs to read your site, I bet you could figure out how. My opinion stands, you are not what you claim you are. And this isn’t because your excellent knowledge of English or you had been in Jakarta because I have a few Thai friends with these features but these people wouldn’t run such a site.

  3. Clifford Sloane Says:

    You are definitely not Thai!
    Or at least, if you are, most of your education was in an English-speaking country.

    My evidence is the following quote:
    to actually go home with them and pay for, well, everything for, well, everyone.

    This is a very unusual sentence, even for a native speaker. It shows not only a fluency with the language that is rare among Thais, but it shows a stylistic precision that is rare even among native speakers. The person who wrote this is a professional writer and a native speaker of English. I commend the writer for very well-crafted delivery; it’s the message that I find objectionable.
    Come on Mister/Mizz “FunnyFarang”. Be honest with us.

  4. Lupisque Says:

    Fon, I’m still waiting for a response to my dinner invitation.

  5. Clifford Sloane Says:

    Lupisque,

    Don’t bother. The person we have been calling “Fon” is actually a British man who posts on thaivisa as Oxford Will. Some of our network sleuths on koratfarang.com uncovered this.
    Will really had me going, too. But the hoax is now uncovered.

  6. Lupisque Says:

    I still wish to meet Fon, or “Fon” I’m curious about this site. Be it a Thai lady or a British gentleman who composes it. I want to know the motive. I’m am still not sure if this website is phony or not. There is still a reason for it. I would still like to meet the author. I’m going to Thailand, so why not…

  7. Ragten Says:

    Hell knows no fury like a woman scorned.

  8. tommo Says:

    I am just curious, Do you give English lessons? Because you certainly have a fantastic grasp of the language and may be able to give me some tips.

  9. tommo Says:

    well well well we know where you coming from and what provider you use and possably more…. your not Thai are you?

    IH Networks
    City Encino
    Metro Code 803
    Area Code 818
    Longitude -118.498199
    Latitude 34.153999
    Country United States

    Do you know what Thai people have said about this site? be careful if i was you…

  10. tommo Says:

    We have got you. So now all the racist comments you have posted on here will now be handed to the Police and you will be delt with.
    Cheers.

    Registrar: WILD WEST DOMAINS, INC.
    Whois Server: whois.wildwestdomains.com
    Referral URL: http://www.wildwestdomains.com
    Name Server: NS1.OXFORDWEBHOSTING.COM
    Name Server: NS2.OXFORDWEBHOSTING.COM
    Status: clientDeleteProhibited
    Status: clientRenewProhibited
    Status: clientTransferProhibited
    Status: clientUpdateProhibited
    Updated Date: 23-oct-2007
    Creation Date: 30-nov-2005
    Expiration Date: 30-nov-2008

  11. Fon Says:

    Hi Tommo – if you hurry, you can still get to Nana plaza before closing time! I’m sure you’re exhausted by all your detective work as Internet Policeman.

  12. tommo Says:

    Is that the best you can come up with? hahaha sad person.

  13. KoratFarang Says:

    Thanks for the link to KF. Open invite to join up anytime you like. Cheers.

  14. franklyb Says:

    ye koratfarang needs members there all so bored of each other theres even jason thai now trying to make it more interesting now

  15. Gaudente Says:

    “Besides, when I take a Thai girl to bed I pay her a really big tip!
    Losers.”
    Fools indeed. I never pay more than 500 baht.That’s two days of salary for one hour’s work.

  16. Gaudente Says:

    “What could a professional Thai adult who works a 6 day week for 20 000 thb possibly be doing in Jakarta! Come on.. think really hard. I know you can do it.”
    Working in a local brothel to pay motorbike instalments ? Naah…why fly to Jakarta for that , there are so many brothels in Thailand already ! I give up !

  17. A Says:

    I have to say that everything in this is correct. As a foreigner who has been here 7 years I can honestly say that I do not believe there is 1 foreigner (certainly in Bangkok) who is not playing the game. I admit that others play more frequently than others, but please lets give up with this BS “I am a good guy”. These ‘good’ guys are the scumbags that chastice any other foreigners who do not wear yellow T shirts, orange bracelets etc and then go and play themselves. Just for the record, yes I am married and yes I have misbehaved on occasions.
    But honestly I am sick and tired of middle aged farangs displaying their yellow T shirts and not understanding anything about the country or its culture.
    Fon whether you exist or not. Good on you :)

  18. Web Designer Says:

    I am an IT professional I specialize in Internet Marketing and came across this site researching the market for a client that wants to set a blog about life in Bangkok.

    I must admit I have been quite amused by all the goings on here. For those of you that dont understand the domain look up process this site was registered and is being hosted in the UK.

    Why would someone that is so proudly Thai do that ?

    That fact alone tells you who this blogger is, he is not Thai a Thai would pay Thai rates to a Thai Provider. If he doesnt understand that then he is not as smart as you give him credit for, secondly this blog has an Alexa ranking of 22,000,000 for those of you that don’t know that means he gets at 3 visitors day, for a site that has been registered since feb 2006 that’s embarrassing you are give this fool sustinance but it is amusing non the less.

  19. Michael Says:

    I’m as disgusted as you by many foreigners in Thailand (and plenty of totally disgusting Thais as well) but actually YOU SOUND JUST LIKE THEM WHEN THEY TALK ABOUT THAIS.

    Ignorant and racist, a REDNECK – is that something to be proud of???

    When they say “All Thais are lazy, stupid, etc.” and what are you doing but just echoing it back in reverse? Are you trying to prove they are right? Can’t rise above the shit, but just want to get right down in the shit and be as shitty as possible yourself?

    You devalue yourself by doing that, get some self respect and get a life!

    BTW, to all the Farang versions of “Farang Ignorance”, and the Thai “Farang Ignorance” Copycats posting hateful bullshit here – what the hell??? Bunch of Coconut and Farang rednecks, no difference at all!!!!

  20. goeast Says:

    rock on, fon!

    Their little farang egos can’t possible take the idea that there exists a thai woman who doesn’t think they are “most handsum man” so they have to argue that you even exist! LOLZ.

  21. dozer Says:

    Being a farang living in Korat who is married to a Thai lady who was not a bar girl i find your site and the drivel contained therein highly offensive.
    having said that i do agree that many westerners do exploit the underprivelged people of Thailand….
    your vitriolic rants however detract from your comments because your generalisation is the same as westerners who considers all Thai women as working girls…i think it would be in the best interest of the Thai people for you to simply shut the f$%k up!!!

  22. Akanit Kuntolbutra Says:

    Don’t worry you are reaching a thai audience. An english speaking Thai audience. I am thai and what you point out is understandable.

  23. monkeylove Says:

    Well Akanit Kuntolbutra if you got rid of all the whores and bar girls there would be no problems with sleazy farang anymore, but to do that thailand would have to actually do something wouldnt they and well its just a lot easier to blame the farang

  24. truth be known Says:

    NEWSFLASH!

    People exploit people! Oh noez!

    Farang/Thai… There’s no difference, you get good ones, you get bad ones… You get Thais high on Yabba and hacking tourists to death for money, sounds like you all really are divine and the ferangs are a scourge and should be shot at birth yeah?

    One of my neighbors and his wife has raised over £10M in Aid for Thailand/Cambodia over the years and continue to do so. There’s thousands of your country men and women that would rather you out the country than these particular ‘farangs’, and I know scores of other people and organisations making up for your governments failings, ensuring children’s safety, well being and education in some areas, them pesky farangs…

    Pointing fingers just makes you look stupid, action a stop of all prostitution, enforce drug laws, carry out change then come with your diatribes…

    Or play the “It’s their fault not ours” That’ll get you nowhere fast…

  25. Akanit Kuntolbutra Says:

    It can’t be helped monkey love. The Bourgeoise of my country are selfish, i go to a Uni here in Thailand and well their children are driving BMWs, Mercedes, Audi,etc. Like some car showroom. When i drive back up North after during the summer break all i see is a bunch of farmland and exploited people lol.

  26. Janet Brown Says:

    This is a brilliant blog–rock on!

Leave a Reply