When coming home from work I often have to take the Bangkok Skytrain system and frequently have to go past a station called Nana. Nana station is on upper Sukhumvit road and many people live around there, work around there and go to meet their friends. However, it also has one of the cities most popular farang hangout areas known as Nana Plaza. In the evenings when everyone is leaving work, the skytrain gets pretty busy but is made worse by the fact that you get a bunch of smelly, fat drunk farangs piling onto the train just so they can get to Nana.

They do this because it means they don’t have to walk much to get from their bedroom to their next sexual encounter with a girl from a farm.  Unfortunately even this miniscule amount of exercise proves too much for most of them and they begin to leak all over the skytrain. This would be OK if we had some sort of holding pen at the far end, preferably near the driver, where you could sit the farangs until Nana station and then the driver can just press a button and have them ejected, via projectile, directly into the plaza. But unfortunately as it is, you have to rub up against them, and most insist on holding the higher rail above my head so I am forced to have line of sight with multiple wet armpits which emit an odour not entirely unlike a nasty huamark klong.

Next time you are on the skytrain at early evening, make a note of counting how many ugly farangs are waiting for Nana station. You don’t need to listen for the announcement of your station because basically the closer you get to Nana, the more they perspire. Then they waddle off down the stairs, get a taxi up the road and my farming family sisters hopefully gouge their pockets for all they are worth.